Dear Email Solicitor,
You are not my friend, don't be so presumptious as to call me friend! Your nice words and offers of lovely gifts, prizes and money will not make me drop my guard. If you were truly my friend you'd take the time to find out where I live, show up on my front door and bequeath me with a suitcase full of the money and prizes you claim to be holding on my behalf.
I will not reply to your email, open your attachment or call to buy your diet and cleanse products just because you're using nationally recognized corporatation names or the famous Dr Oz.
I will not believe I've won some kind of fabulous lottery that I haven't bought tickets for or that I am the beneficiary to someone I've never heard of.
I will not respond with the request for my checking account number or banks routing information. If you were truly my friend you wouldn't think I had stupid written all over my forehead.
These email solicitations you are sending me every day and sometimes every hour are a total waste of your time and mine! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF HEARING FROM YOU! Go away and leave me alone!
Sincerely,
Shara
4 comments:
Boy, I feel better now that I've vented! And I've given myself a good laugh at the many misspelled words I've found after writing this little letter! I guess I should not use such big words!
I was beginning to wonder if we went to the same school with all those spelling errors, hee hee hee! Take care I am glad that I found you through FB. And by the way I decided to wait a little longer before I totally give up on it! :-]
Tell Darrell that I said hello! You have a darling family.
You're stupid for not using the mirror to check your forehead. It does say stupid, but you wrote it backwards :)
You mean I didn't really win the lottery? I've been waiting all week for the giant check to arrive. :)
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